Sunday, January 12, 2014

I Didn't Want to Go to Church Today

I didn't want to go to church today.

Really.

I couldn't get myself out of bed. And it wasn't because I was sick.

And I didn't have anything else to do.

I just didn't want to go.

Sundays are the longest day of the week. Church is the loneliest place to be.

Everyone is so busy. So wrapped up in the program. Wrapped up in their family and friends.

If you're not part of the program and you're there by yourself, why bother?

Everyone talks about love, accountability and the church family.

No one talks to me and I go home to leftovers warmed up in the microwave for lunch by myself.

Maybe no one would notice if I stopped coming.

Maybe there's a friendlier church somewhere else.

I really didn't want to go to church today.

But I went anyway.

The morning message was about the Wise Men coming to worship Jesus. "If you came to church for any other reason, you're here for the wrong reason."

Bam! Right between the eyes!

As I looked through my excuses for not wanting to come to church, they had nothing to do with worshiping Jesus and everything to do about me.

Then I was reminded of a lesson I'd learned earlier in the week, and blogged about, too. "We live by faith and not by sight."

I was building my theology of the church based on my experiences, not on the truths of God's Word.

Bam! Right between the eyes - again!

That didn't make being at church any less lonely. And I still ate microwaved leftovers alone.

But God pointed out the sinful thinking in my heart, gently reminding me that it's all about Him and not about me.

Okay. Maybe it wasn't so gentle.

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